so i spent my entire weekend with vlad. it was pretty normal we hung out like we did when we were friends, but this time we went up to his room and sat on his brother nico's bed. after awhile we were laying down talking so i put my arm around him and suddenly everything got extremely awkward and no one had anything to say. not to mention that when i put my arm across him he didn't move. at all. and the same thing happened the next day. we laid on nico's bed while vlad stared at the ceiling saying nothing, and i had my arm across him feeling akward.

THE FUNNY PART -----------------

anyway i thought it was pretty odd that an 18 year old guy who once called me whilst shopping for porn and condoms wouldn't even move when his girlfriend spent two days lying in his bed cuddled up to him. we talked about it and he just said he used to think all americans were monsters and he just wasn't used to things moving very fast. so i'm glad we can discuss things, but it was still a funny story, so today at school i sat down next to jackson and since i have such an amzing gift at storytelling i managed to reduce him and brendan to fits of laughter, heightened by the fact that in the middle of the story brendan blurted out 'i spilled coffee on my crotch!' and it was only about 8:15 so there really weren't alot of people in the library. i was only aware of jackson and brendan, and later hladini, who laughed along, and there were a couple people in the sunspace, but i didn't think they could hear us talking.

so a couple hours later i get called to JC, (the school Judicial Council) and it said they'd recieved a report that i'd been telling an inappropriate story in which i'd had sex with my boyfriend and his brother. i began to laugh hysterically and even more so when they told me that the report was filed by a kid's mom who pretty much only heard the words 'bed' 'boyfriend' and 'brother' and decided i was an evil child. anyway the JC eventually determined that i was having a private conversation with friends and let us leave

so my dad has partial custody of me on wednesdays, and tonight we got some food and i ended up just sleeping on his couch for awhile. he'd sorta been pissing me off. like, he always asks me about school, and when i tell him anything he'll just start criticizing me. if you look at me, you can probably see some stuff people might have problems with, like my hair, clothes, and make-up, but he manages to get everything. he criticizes my voice, my skin, my weight, my friends, vlad (he's not comfortable with us dating), the way i talk, the stuff i do, the things i learn, the way i eat, and pretty much if i tell him anything i did that day, he'll have a problem with it.
it was sorta getting on my nerves today, especially in the car when he screamed at me for about 20 minutes because i'm going to get arrested for downloading music (even though i explained to him several times that the site i use was ruled constitutional and it really was allowed). and when we pulled up in front of my mom's apartment two cops were standing there. i got kinda scared but it turned out to just be my old probation officer, and he was making his mandatory check ins to ensure that i'm following the rules. since my dad was with me, i was pretty much within all my bounds, but after he left my dad shoved his way into the door and started screaming at me. this made my moms 160 fucking pound demon dogs come runnng down the stairs. and the door is fucking hanging wide open and i'm holding back the dogs and he's screaming at me. so i started yelling at him to leave, and he yelled back that 'he has a RIGHT to know whats going on, and why wasn't he given a copy of the probation rules' and the truth is he actually has no rights since he gave me to my mom and he didn't participate in ANY of my court stuff (nor would we want him to, considering he acts like this on a normal basis) so he isn't entitled to anything, and the door is still open, the dogs are trying to get out and were screaming at each other. and finally he started going back to screaming about how i give him to much attitude and why did i get arrested because there's nothing to be proud of me for and then he started screaming about vlad, who half the reason i wanted this to end is so i could call him because he seemed like, about to fucking drop dead yesterday he was so sick.
so then i thought about throwing him right out the door like mom does, but then i realized he had 200 pounds on me and would probably just wait outside to bitch at mom until she got home, or just call my cell phone repeatedly. so finally i yelled over him that the dog was gonna fucking go nuts if we left the door open and kept yelling at each other like this so he gave out like the worlds biggest sigh and started yelling something else, so i slammed the door in his face, and now i'm sitting here waiting for mom to get home, cause odds are she'll bitch me out again for 'upsetting the dogs' not to mention everytime someone talks about probation thats an automatic bitch out about how horribly i fail at everything. and it's not like i can't not tell her because my dad probably woke up half the fucking neighbors. sigh......

Current Mood: angry

Saturday- finally met vlad. and two of his brothers. saw movie. movie sucked. went home. recieved call from vlad, agreed to go over to his house the next day.

Sunday- get another call from vlad. he says his mothers been forcing him to continuously brush his teeth because 'if emma comes over she'll want you to have clean teeth' (O.o). my mom drove me over to his house, and we sat in the living room with two of his brothers (sandis and niko). his other brother, casper, (who apparently has severe anger problems) was locked in his room. after a couple of minutes vlad's mom came in and started ordering his brothers out because we needed 'space' lots and lots of 'space' (seriously, what does she think were going to do?!) we went outside and sandis followed, only to throw cups, forks, and other dangerous objects at us. i was starting to get annoyed, when i heard a voice. the window was open, and casper was sitting on the roof, and throwing shingles at us. it distracted sandis enough for us to get away. his family owns quite a large property, and when we got to the end of the driveway we couldnt even see the house, so we sat down on a rock and started talking. about an hour later we became aware that casper was watching us. (he had jumped off the roof and cut through the woods to follow us) he was chucking rocks at vlad, but got tired and sat on the grass, so i attempted to make conversation. i told him that i went to TCS to which he went 'circle school? is it hehe is it near a church?' i said yes, to which he began jumping up and down excitedly going 'I EGGED THAT PLACE hehe I EGGED THAT PLACE!' (now i was already becoming annoyed with casper, and since there was no other way for him to know that my school had, in fact, been egged several weeks ago) i lost it. i started swearing, which only escalated him, causing him to throw rocks, spit, swear, pour sunflower seeds over my head, and attempted to offend vlad by using the words 'emma' and 'blowjob' in the same sentence (he failed miserably). however it did cause vlad to start shrieking 'leave emma alone, she didn't do anything to you!' hysterically, and then begin beating casper. i watched for a few minutes as they began throwing larger, heavier, rocks at each other, before casper picked up vlad's broken skateboard and hurled it at my face. this sent vlad into another fit of rage, and the next thing i recall is casper throwing rocks at the neighbors before curling up in the grass (still swearing and spitting) until niko came and got him. we talked for awhile longer and then went back to his yard where we continued talking (only with more awkward silences for reasons i'm unsure of) until finally my mom showed up. we grabbed some food and i went home only to get more calls from vlad about 10 minutes later, inviting me to come over again this coming weekend.

Monday- spent most of the day recounting the 'epic saga of sunday' to people in school, before peter burst in excitedly saying he was going to bake the Portal Cake (for those of you who don't know Portal is a videogame in which you're testing experimental weapons, and a computer voiceover constantly reminds you that opon successful completion of the training you will be escorted to a party with cake and all of your friends. they put alot of emphasis on the cake and it becomes rather amusing)so all of us crowded into the cooking kitchen, where peter mixed together a cake recipie that used more sugar and chocolate than any other baking project i've ever seen. when he took it out of the oven, it promptly collapsed upon itself, but everyone still grabbed a handful. it was the most hideous looking, yet best tasting thing i've ever had. there was too much sugar in it, and after i crashed, we all had some tea, and laura and sarah made smoothies. i had a dollar in my pocket so i bought one, and despite the fact that i had an issue with sucking down what was thick white glop in a cup, it also coated my mouth with so much sugar i didn't even have to add anything to my tea because it made everything taste sweet. sugar. overload. then someone made a crack about toasters and david told me that his family had painted faces all over their toasters. and when attempting to find the pictures to show me he asked brendan for the 'pictures of toasters in erotic postions.' unfortunately this is not the worst thing they've showed me so far this er...week lol.

Tuesday- no idea what happened here. i guess i'm getting sick. all i know is i went to school at 8. around 2:50 i woke up and realized my bus was coming, and was vaguely aware of jared sitting in the office covered in bandages. went home, got ready, and went to rehab. when we got there, there was a sign on the door that said we were supposed to go to the church across the street for a party. my group was hanging out in the parking lot. spitting. lol. we went inside, and after learning that our treatment facility is named after a racehorse. yes. a racehorse. everyone that completed the program had to give a speech. the only people completing were in the adult groups, and since we had obviously no interest, our attention turned to the bowl of mints on the table. mints, no big deal right? wrong.
old guy: um, i'd just like to thank all of you for helping me on my road to recov- *CRUNNNNNNNNCCHHHHHHHHH* *Bubba's eyes shift back and forth* *CRUNNNNCHHHHH* and if thats not the worst of it...
young looking woman: when i first came to gaudenzia i- *the song 'Let's Go Get Stoned (ouch) by Sublime begins playing*
me: *whisper* hello?
vlad: heyyyyy emmmaaa whats up?
me: *ultra whisper* i have to call you back im in rehaab
vlad: uh, ok.
*hang up phone* *everyone in entire room is staring at me*
Officiator: SMOKE BREAK! *underage guys at my table* "Alriiiiighhhttt!"
then we got free spaghetti. they did neglect to tell us that we were required to stay longer than usual, and we actually forced our way out before cake was served. (most likely much to the relief of the adult groups who were sick of hearing us discuss the series 'Spongebong Hemppants' all night)

Wednesday- learned that jared actually broke his collarbone because jackson tackled him. also learned don't wear government issued communist gear in school. u get made fun of. alot. also the new name for stroganoff is 'commie-o's' or possible 'stalin-o's' then we played nerf russian roulette, followed by a nerf gun war xD, before i leanred that i absolutely do not care what the library committee does. and of course my father had to call and harrass me for why i wasn't over this weekend, and after i told him, he had a few 'wonderful' things to say about vlad. and to top it all off, i discovered some equally 'wonderful' things some of my old 'friends' were saying behind my back. great. 

Current Mood: blah

today at TCS i walked into the art room and hit a crowd of 30 people who were playing mafia, which i'd never played before, but turned out to be extremely interesting. for those of you who have never played, cards are passed out, and there is a value to each card
ace: mafia
king: cop
queen: nurse
number card: peasant
and one person is narrator

Cody: everyone have cards? ok. everyone shut your eyes. mafia open your eyes. select your victim. mafia shut your eyes. nurses open your eyes. select who you want to 'save'. nurses shut your eyes. cops, scuzz, fuzz, po-po's, pigs, ...effing pigs, *laughter* open your eyes. who do you think is mafia? i'll tell you if you're right. pigs shut your eyes. everyone open your eyes.
last week someone was playing frisbee, ultimate frisbee, in fact, when MAFIA DEPLOYED RAZORS shot out and CUT TRUE'S HEAD OFF! *more laughter*
*True slams head on table* the nurses did NOT get there in time.
True: First Round!
Sean: I ACCUSE MIKE!!!
Miranda: SECOND!
Cody: ok mike, you have been accused of being mafia. what is your alibi?
Mike: uhhh well last week cat aliens from Nebulon 5
Cody: so you're not in the mafia but you're on drugs?
Mike: ...cat aliens from Nebulon 5 came and abducted me!
Cody: everyone vote! *voting* Ok, Mike has been found NOT GUILTY! ok, Mafia open your-
Panda: Excuse me!
Cody: what?
Panda: i have to do my chore. my chore is cleaning the art table
Cody: we'll take care of it don't worry
*more people enter*
Cody: Mafia- *new people begin talking loudly*
Panda: besides it's like (talking over people) ITS LIKE PRIME CHORE TIME ANYWAY AND MAYBE IF YOU WEREN'T PLAYING THAT STUPID GAME-
Cody- SHUT UP EVERYONE! MAFIA OPEN YOUR- *is drowned out* OK ALL IN FAVOR OF SHUTTING UP!!
Everyone Playing/Observing the Game: AYE!!
*Panda and people leave*
Cody: thank god. mafia open your eyes.....
ok so the mafia hired a person to help "fix" their computers, however, the computer...hmmm...the computer *long pause* the computer was made of cyanide and JARED died.
Miranda/Ashley: did he EAT the computer?
Cody: there was some uhh...computer licking involved
*Jared burns red*
*LAUGHTER*
----GAME CONTINUES-----
*Later*
Cody: mafia shut your eyes.
Jared: *singing* swimming with the fishies...swimming with the fishies....
Cody: mafia open your eyes
Jared: swimming with the fishhiiiiessssss...waay down below swimming with the fishies...
Cody/Several Others: JARED SHUT UP!
Cody: ok so someone was swimming in the Gulf of Mexico with the dolphins
Jared: SWIMMING WITH FISSHHHIIIIESSSSSSSS!!!!
Cody: -and a MAFIA CONTROLLED DOLPHIN *laughter* with SHARP TEETH killed ROSE.
Sean: I ACCUSE EMMA!!!!
Someone: SECOND
Someone: THIRD
Me: i'm not guilty, i uhhh was at a freak convention.
Cody: with dolphins?
Me: no with other people that look like me *laughter*
Cody: lets vote. *voting* we find Emma GUILTY! congratulations, Emma was NOT mafia.
*loud groans*
Cody: considering we have not yet voted off one of the 4 members of the mafia and there are only 6 people left, i'd say the mafia had seriously won this round!
*final people voted off, entire mafia still left*
Everyone: NEW GAME!!!
Mike (new narrator): *passes out cards* Mafia open your eyes....
--several minutes later---
Mike: ok nurses open your eyes
random small child: Mike will you check my chore?
Mike: fine *leaves*
Me: can we open our eyes....
Someone (idk my eyes were closed): ok nurses shut your eyes
Someone else: whats going on?
Mukunda: ok nurses shut your eyes and then everyone else open their eyes
People: WHAT?
Cody: THIS IS NOT HARD! NURSES SHUT YOUR EYES! EVERYONE OPEN YOUR EYES ON THE COUNT OF 3. ONE! TWO! THREE! oohhhh heyyy mike's gone! i wondered what we were doing....
*several people slam their heads onto the table*
*Claire takes over as narrator*
Claire: ok so, someone was in the library tidying up, they moved some bookshelves, when a GIGANTIC SPIKE SHOT OUT AND STABBED DIVAKI IN THE HEART!
Sean: I ACCUSE EMMA!
Me: WTF!!!!!
Miranda/Laura: SECOND!
Me: you guys know how lazy i am! do you really think i'm gonna take the time and effort to plant a spike in a bookshelf?
*Mike returns*
Mike: everyone vote! *voting* We find Emma GUILTY! and Emma was NOT part of the mafia.
Me: seriously why do you all keep thinking i'm the mafia!
*looks at clock*
Me: well that ok i guess, i really need to do my chore....
*packs up*
Mike: -we find Sarah GUILTY! and Sarah was in fact, part of the Mafia. *cheers*
*Me and Sarah do our chore*
Sarah: William! will you check our chore?
William: No.
Me/Sarah: WHAT?
William: you were playing that game. i will not check off anyone who was playing that game. *shudders* i know i was playing earlier but now there are so many people... *muttering to self*...people....
Sarah: i'll go find someone...
*Claire comes running up the hall with a vacuum cleaner*
Claire: i can't believe you missed it! Sam voted to kill off Miranda, but Mike got it wrong and said that Sam poisoned himself and then the whole game just sort of collapsed....
Me: *laughing* wowww. i'm just curious, why did you guys keep thinking i was mafia?
Several people: BECAUSE YOU LOOK SCARY LIKE MAFIA!
Me: >.< Thanks.... *starts laughing harder*
Claire: turns out Jackson is the one that voted me off...
*Jackson walks by*
Claire:...because he's THE CANADIAN MAFIA!
*everyone in hall laughs*
*jackson runs away and later gets extremely bitch slapped on the porch*


yes this is really school. xD

Current Mood: amused

so y'know its been awhile since i've had any sort of relationship...at all... and so my friend katie says 'hey wanna meet my friend paul, he's kind of an anime nerd but maybe you'll like him.' and well i had nothing else to do and he seemed cute so i said 'hey why not.'

he started off nice.

then he said that after looking at my pictures he couldn't tell whether or not i was hot, and that i looked kind of fat.

RULE #1: I DO NOT HAVE THE NICKNAME 'EMMAREXIA' FOR NOTHING. DO NOT INSULT MY FUCKING WEIGHT.

considering i recently went on a vacation where i basically was starved for 11 days.

we exchanged one or two more messages and i was beginning to feel as though he was examining like livestock especially after he said i looked alot thinner in my new pictures, but he couldn't say i looked great because my older pictures were misleading. and that he couldn't be a bigger ass than vince, katie's ex. while thats true, i told him he was still an ass, and he blocked me.

after that i just sat there, muttering 'ass'. out loud. for awhile.

i still very much want the last word. or an axe.

but god knows i'm not gonna eat for awhile -_-.

and katie seriously doesn't know me at all. but then again i've seen some of my other friends do impressions of her boyfriend that usually consist of 'I'm Brandon...i listen to Norweigan metal..im a douche...you can't listen to my music it's too hardcore for you...i'm a douche' so maybe she assumes i'd like my own douchebag, but it's DEFINETLY not paul. -_-.

Current Mood: enraged

Day 2:

After being woken up by my grandma, i tried to dig through my suitcase to attempt to get an outfit without completely spilling all the contents of my suitcase on the floor, seeing as we had to check out in a few hours. while i was digging out some jeans, my cousin decided that i take to long and stole the damn shower. i am a high mantinence person, and i wanted to shower first so i could try to be almost finished by the time my cousin was. so of course i was stuck milling around the hotel room for 15 minutes until Alex was done, and then be required to listen to him whining in my ear that i take too long, while i screamed back at him that he shouldn't have stolen the shower. yes, we were already beginning to get on each others' nerves.
Finally, we checked out and began the 3 hour drive to Aunt Joanne's house. shortly after, we discovered that we were hopelessly lost somewhere in the Madera Valley, and Alex and i began filming our own show entitled 'Bickering Relatives' after listening grandma and aunt mary fight. after 6 hours, we still had not arrived at joanne's, and after passing out of all signs of civilization, losing cell phone reception, and having my ears pop from travelling up a mountain, we ran into my uncle Michael and their dog Chewy getting the mail. he helped us find their house, and i was introduced to my aunt joanne, and i've come to realize i have more in common with her than anyone else in this crazy family, especially since her first sentence was "hey kids, we have a hottub and if you wanna go in naked thats totally fine!" so while my still flistered grandma was gulping mass amounts of vodka (which she continued to do for the rest of the vacation)
after awhile joanne and michael wanted to show us all these waterfalls in their development (theyre uber rich). michael went skinny dipping causing aunt mary to scream at his unsightly 55 year old..you know.
when we finished climbing around and i had reclaimed my flip flops from some kids that stole them and used them for water shoes, we went back to joanne's where we did rounds of nude hottubbing and joanne made us some of her yummy crab casserole (alex is a seriously picky eater, and i had to fry him up soem canadian bacon and canteloupe.) unfortunately i then became seriously ill and opted to go to bed rather than watch a movie with joanne, michael, mary, and grandma.

Current Mood: bored

well as long as i've been abandoned yet again by my friends tonight i might as well make a full report on my CA experience...

DAY 1:
turns out if you let your alarm ring continuously for more than 1 hour it will just shut off. my grandma showed up and after struggling to fit both of our suitcases in her trunk we picked up my cousin and aunt, who then had to fit both of their suitcases in as well. we drove two hours to Baltimore BWI airport while my aunt Margy and my grandma bickered continuously.

after my grandma struggled with the airports self-service electronic kiosks and we went through the infamous airport security personnel (honestly how am i gonna hide a bomb in my flip-flops?) we got on a plane to Atlanta. before we took off my phone started ringing.
Katie: Hey Emma, i was just wondering if you wanted to go to Shawns today...
Me: um...kind of on a plane
Katie: OMG! your on a plane! to where?
Me: Atlanta
Katie: ew...
Me: i'm going to CA..
Katie: o really? well sorry, bye.

Considering how excited i was for this trip, and how much of a deal i made about going i'd say i need better friends.
when we arrived in Atlanta i became extremely excited and made a hysterical phone call to my mother (MOM! MOM! IM IN ATLANTA!) and we got on our plane to San Jose, however it was not an easy task considering my cousin almost shit his pants when he saw some arabic women wearing chadors get on in front of us. i later learned he has no respect for other cultures, gays, me, or his mother. Margy begged for the window seat and being a pushover, i gave it to her. i was kinda pissed that i now had to sit next to the aisle and my grandmother, but i felt better when i realized i now had a good view of the airplane TV screen (this is a 4 hour flight, quite alot for someone whos never flown/been out of their own time zone) and i saw the passanger sitting diagonal to me, who happened to be an attractive, body pierced older guy reading a book on communism and who promptly removed his shoes after takeoff. now i had something to fantasize about while we were in flight. of course, i never actually said anything to him.

we landed in San Jose, it was about 10:00 their time 1:00 ours. after locating our baggage we took the airport shuttle and stood in line at a cheapo rent a car place. As it turns out my grandmother can understand no accents (at ALL) and after struggling to understand the man who showed us to our Jeep con California plates i finally stepped in and explained to my grandmother that he was checking the car for scratches not testing the clutches and we could leave now. when we arrived at the airport hotel my cousin and i had a desire to go swimming, and after finding out from the hotel recpetionist who seemed shocked to learn they even had a pool that it didn't close we did, in fact, go swimming. of course it did seem like no one had cleaned it in awhile so i left, showered, and went to bed.

more to come, have to go now.

Current Location: in my jammies
Current Mood: blank

so mike obviously assumes i own some, and nearly gave the keyboard a healthy dose of drool. i finally had to explain to him that i am not the crazy sex goddess everyone thinks i am. yeah there was the zakal incident, but other than that, honestly how did that rumor even start?

and why am i posting so much on here lately?

boredom i guess....

Current Mood: amused

so i've spent my entire summer so far reading these books my tutor gives me. fortunately he's also liberal america-hating pinko commie scum who has an obsession with russia, so all the books he gives me are about -you guessed it- soviet russia. and honest to god, dead russian guys are boring. they probably died because they bored themselves to death with their own writing. haha. so anyway, if i'm not doing that, i'm usually on myspace..or sleeping. but tonight i was on said myspace, and this local band that i go to see posted a link to this website in japan that had a biography on them. now these guys are nothing, (no offense, they're very good, just not well known). they barely have a following in pennsylvania. why japan? but then i got to thinking... what else do they know? as some of you know, i may possibly go to japan next year, but now i'm a little nervous. with all the pictures and websites on me i'm terribly afraid i'm going to show up in japan and some guy is going to stop me in the street and be liek *japanese accent* 'oh, emma mchenryaru! u are 7th most recognizeable person in japan, may i have autograph!' i don't know, i thought it was something funny from the innermost workings of my mind. but seriously, i mean just last week i got some comments from these guys in china like 'oh pretty american lady, we have been wanting to talk to you for ages but you are soo intimidating.' and i thought that was cute. until he started begging me to be his girlfriend and i pretended to be a lesbian. well i have no idea where this is going.. so night y'all. or not. i just ate a whole bag of pixie sticks.

Current Location: living room
Current Mood: hyper
Current Music: just watching friends...

mood crash..... don't ask why =/.

Current Mood: aggravated